Online Class: Etiquette for Children and Teens

What is etiquette?

Manners, social skills, politeness, civility, graciousness, cordiality, decorum, correctness, and respect are all terms used to describe etiquette. However, rather than being any one of these individual things, etiquette is a combination of these qualities. It is the ability to treat others with respect, it is also having self respect; additionally, it is the knowledge of the correct things to do in social situations. Many would believe that etiquette is merely a quality extended to others when "in public," but in reality, it is a knowledge that, once learned, is carried into one's private and family life as well. A huge misconception is that those who have etiquette are reserved, stuffy, boring, and not much fun to be around. Not true at all! Etiquette should never be pretending to be someone you are not. The only exception to this rule is using correct behavior in serious situations. If you are an upbeat person who is always making jokes, that is fine, however, if you are at a funeral or another serious event, making jokes is not appropriate and shows a lack of respect for those who are grieving. Etiquette is always being yourself, but also being mindful of others.

Why is etiquette so important?

We often hear the term, "Don't judge a book by its cover," however, the truth of the matter is, we all make assumptions about others based on our first impressions and ongoing interactions with them. Those who treat us (and others) with respect, are usually those we want to spend more time with. They are people we enjoy being around, and because we like to be in their presence, we grow to trust them. Does this mean that having good manners makes one a good person? No, it does not. Neither does having bad manners make one a bad person. However, having good etiquette will provide one with the opportunity to meet, and be comfortable with, a variety of people in a variety of circumstances. Etiquette also has the effect of making others feel at ease. 

The answer to this question is yes -- and no. Having good manners is only a part of etiquette. Saying "please" and "thank you," having good table manners, sending thank you cards, and listening to people when they speak are the "mechanics" of etiquette. Etiquette goes much deeper than knowing the procedure of writing a good thank you note, or learning the correct way to shake a person's hand. It is certainly important to learn the correct methods of etiquette, but it is equally important to practice the methods often enough that they become ingrained behaviors. Etiquette, when practiced over time, will become second nature. It will fit comfortably, like a perfectly sized shoe.

Can etiquette be taught to children and teens?